Juggling Parenthood and Your Brand
Over the past two weeks, I have shared a brief summary of my book ‘Broken Back to peace’ with the lovely Kubi Springer and the #AskKubi audience live on Ruach Radio and live on Instagram @shebuildsbrands & @s.a_daibo.
This week, we shared the story of Alesha who is a single mother, raising a young black teenage son in London and trying to manage her working life. This prompted us to discuss the everyday struggle that so many parents face managing their homes, alongside their businesses and careers.
Below are a few tips we use to bring balance to our home and work.
The Morning Routine
Establishing a morning routine will set you up for the day and enable you to maintain focus. You will feel that you have already accomplished a task before the day ahead.
Try waking up as little as 15 – 30 minutes before your family and having some “ME” time.
During your “Me” time, its good to stay positive and meditate even for as little as 5 minutes.
For religious mothers try to pray for 5 to 10-minutes. You will feel constructive and it will allow you to think about who and where you are in that moment in time. If you find daily prayer hard to do you can use this acronym that has helped me.
Praise – Be thankful.
Repent – Repent of all sin.
Ask – Place your petitions in life before God.
Yield - Sit and wait to hear what God is saying to you.
Journaling – write down your thoughts and feelings in relation to your business/career and family life. What are you feeling? What have you accomplished, and what do you need to work on?
Exercise – Keeping a healthy body also keeps your mind healthy. I often make the excuse of not having enough time to actually go to the gym, however that’s just it, an excuse! There are great and effective workouts on YouTube that are free and only take up 10 minutes of your day.
Studies have shown that exercising first thing during the day helps you to sleep better at night, lower your blood pressure and helps you to consume fewer unnecessary calories, just to name a few.
Yearly Family Goals
Sit down together, and share with each other your goals for the year and discuss the ways in which you feel your family can help you achieve them.
Review your goals as a family each quarter.
Hold each other accountable.
Parent & Child dates - Attempt to set aside some time each week, preferably the same day/time each week for you and your child to spend together. With life being so busy, this will give both you and your child something to look forward to together each week. This should help ease the guilt that we often feel when we do not spend as much time with our children as we think we are supposed to.
It’s really important to schedule in time with your partner. It does not have to be every week but at a minimum once a month. You and your loved one should take time away from the children, away from business (although both are likely to come up as topics of conversation) you need to spend time together. Cultivate your love for each other in order to maintain a healthy relationship.
Date night does not only have to be with a partner especially if you are raising children alone. However, it’s just as important to have date nights out with friends to remain close and have healthy adult relationships.
Being a working parent can be tough. You may have strict schedules, overrunning meetings, working further away from your child’s school etc. Having a strong support system of people you can rely on to help you is important.
Establishing a Support System - Join a parent’s group with other mums and dads at your children’s school and utilize family and friends.
Use after-school clubs – your school may have details of clubs in the local area.
After school nannies – can be fairly inexpensive, you can look for companies that have students on their rota.
Boundaries & Routines
Remember that you are in control and not your children, establishing a good bedtime routine is good for both yourself and your child.
Firstly, your child needs to be well rested daily for healthy physical and mental growth, children that are tired during the day are less productive and grumpy.
Bedtime routine and all routines will help your child with their organizational skills in the future.
Having your child going to bed at the same time daily gives you time for yourself to prepare for the following day and relax.
For me, this is about focusing on the task at hand. You are not a clown, stop throwing all your balls in the air and expecting to catch them all at once!
It's important to compartmentalize your thoughts so that you are not overwhelmed. Whilst you are working, try to focus solely on your work.
Whilst you are with your children concentrate and focus on the special time you are having. I know it’s a cliché but they really do grow up fast!
Plan & Commit to your schedule - If you are an entrepreneur your schedule may not be as straight forward, the importance of planning ahead to ensure both your business and personal life maintain somewhat structured is paramount.
Committing to your schedule with your personal activities is valuable. Consistency is key. If you have it in your diary to exercise at 2/3 days a week, actually write down the day and time to keep yourself structured.
Ask for help
Asking for help does not mean you are weak. It just means you are being realistic with where you are in your life as it pertains to your career and family.
Many mothers that I have spoken to often feel that they need to have a superwoman cape. They feel as though asking for help means that they do not measure up as a mother or somehow not doing a good job.
Asking for help eases the tension you may feel within yourself, which you may project in the wrong direction.
Lastly, praise yourself, YOU ARE DOING A WONDERFUL JOB LADY! Don’t be so hard on yourself.
To learn more about Shelia Daibo and buy her book 'Broken Back To Peace' CLICK HERE